Living as a 24/7 submissive is not what most people expect—and it’s certainly not all about sex. I’m in a 24/7 Dominance and submission (D/s) relationship, and while you might picture me spending my days kneeling and waiting for commands, the reality is quite different. D/s isn’t for everyone, and living it 24/7 is for even fewer people, but whatever you think it looks like, you’re probably wrong.
Before dismissing the idea of 24/7 D/s as impractical or too extreme, let me give you a glimpse into what it actually entails.
Note: I am a female submissive with a male Dominant I call "Daddy." However, 24/7 D/s relationships can exist in any gender combination, and among triads or BDSM families. The dynamics of D/s are as diverse as the people who practice it.
Starting the Day
For me, the day actually starts the night before, when I set up the coffee pot so my Dominant has coffee ready at the press of a button the next morning.
5:30 a.m. – I wake up and begin my routine, checking emails and social media while still in bed. My Dominant, who often wakes earlier than I do, will already have his coffee set, thanks to my evening prep.
6:00 a.m. – Time to make his breakfast smoothie and prepare his coffee to go. While he used to stick to just protein powder, milk, and ice (yuck!), I now add fresh fruit to make it more enjoyable.
6:30 a.m. – The goodbye kiss. Sometimes it’s just a kiss, but other times, he’ll edge me, bite my neck, or leave me breathless with his touch. It’s his way of ensuring I’m thinking about him throughout the day.
When I get dressed, I only wear panties if he’s chosen them for me. If I know I need them with an outfit, I either ask him to choose or send a quick text for permission. If I choose them myself, I send him a picture as proof. It’s a playful ritual we both enjoy.
My Day is Mine
After this, my day is mostly mine. I take care of the kids, manage work tasks, run errands, cook, and clean. While I consult with him on some matters, most decisions are mine to make. I choose how I handle my career, household responsibilities, and more, but I always remain mindful of his preferences.
1:30 p.m. – We talk during his lunch break. This is our daily check-in, a time to reconnect. Sometimes it’s the only opportunity I have to step away from work or errands and focus on something else. Our conversation topics range from everyday tasks like grocery shopping to deeper subjects like politics or current events. When we skip the call, it throws off the rhythm of the day for both of us.
Daddy’s Home
5:00 p.m. – By this time, he’s usually home, and unless I’m under a work deadline, my focus shifts to him and the kids. Dinner is prepared and served, the kitchen is cleaned, and I pack his lunch for the next day—another one of my regular tasks. If I don’t pack it at night, I’m scrambling to get it done the next morning!
6:30 p.m. – We take a walk together. It’s sometimes just to the mailbox, or around our complex, but it serves multiple purposes: exercise, fresh air, and uninterrupted time to talk without the kids overhearing. We only skip this if one of us is sick or the weather is bad.
7:00 p.m. – Shower time. We usually shower together, finding moments of connection even with kids around. They don’t question why we’re in the bathroom together, and we don’t feel the need to explain.
Evening Rituals
8:00 p.m. – After the kids are in bed, I make his evening coffee and prepare dessert. Before handing it to him, I kneel in front of him—a small act of submission that centers me after a busy day. He often kisses me softly, tells me he loves me, and gazes at me until I blush. It’s a moment of intimacy and connection that brings us both calm.
Winding Down
9:30 p.m. (or later) – As the day comes to a close, I get the bed ready and perform my evening rituals. Before climbing into bed, I kneel and ask for permission—either waiting for his command or seeking his approval. This ritual can range from tender to playful. Sometimes, I hope for a spanking or a quick session with one of our toys. Other times, it’s simply a signal that it’s time to relax for the night.
We don’t have sex every night, and I’m not always naked unless we’re in bed or sneaking in some rare daytime play. Most of my day is mine to manage, but I fulfill certain tasks that reflect my submission. When we disagree, we handle it privately, away from the kids, always speaking with mutual respect.
He supports my career and dreams, even when they occasionally interfere with my tasks. He’s perfectly capable of making his own coffee or breakfast when necessary and willing to do so. When I’m sick or in pain, I’m not allowed to kneel, even though I try anyway. One look or his “Dom voice” puts a stop to it, showing me how much he cares.
For me, living 24/7 in this dynamic isn’t about the tasks—it’s about always being Daddy’s babygirl, regardless of where we are or what we’re doing. If this sounds restrictive or unappealing, 24/7 D/s might not be for you, and that’s perfectly fine.
Every D/s relationship is unique. If you observe 1000 D/s relationships, you’ll see 1000 different ways of living it. What matters most is trust, communication, consent, and a shared willingness to explore the dynamic together.